I’m noticing an unfortunate trend among a few of the people that I love, and I wanted to take a moment to remind everyone of something small that will make a big difference in the way you relate to the world.

And the way the world relates to you.

The things that you love, believe, and want can be good and even right, without something else being lesser or wrong. It is not necessary to deconstruct and cut down the lives and ideals (hell, even the shoes) that other people choose, or the mistakes that some people make, in order to support your own choices. Everyone has their own journey, and if you feel secure in yourself, own who you are, and truly believe in how you live—well then, that’s enough. That’s everything.

Also be aware that, even if you’re not directly disparaging those in your life, this break-down-build-up worldview can be alienating and exhausting. It’s much easier to feel positive toward someone when his or her happiness does not constantly come at the expense of something. If you’ve been standing atop a broken-down-other to justify your decisions, know that your footing will feel more secure and your happiness more sure if you’re grounded in self-adequacy instead.

You and the things you choose can be good, right, enough, without anyone else in the world being wrong. That’s not a criticism. It’s an affirmation.

Have a great week, everyone.